“Once my wife is snapping at me for whatever reasons, I immediately start checking if I have offended her in any way, or done something she doesn’t like. Most times, I’m almost always able to determine she is merely reacting to something I did. Other than those times, she is always so sweet natured.”
That was a statement from a relationship coach that I know. His name is Ayo and he’s been married for the last fifteen years to the same woman, with whom he has three children. So, he’s had some years of experience, and thus is a lot more believable than a single guy talking on relationships.
When it was the turn of his wife, Bola, to share, she revealed that she doesn’t always intentionally snap at Ayo. Most times, she would have wanted to have a chat, to talk things through, but for one reason or the other, if the timing isn’t right, she starts reacting, and that contaminates the entire atmosphere of their home.
Nowadays, couples lead such hectic lives, they are both exposed to different experiences during the day, and that can dominate their conversation when they do actually talk. Sometimes, the talk can be despondent; family business, money concerns, work challenges, even the gossip sef can be filled with the hard life some loved ones go through.
All of these vibes affect each partner. Some are able to handle it well, and others aren’t. Whatever be the case, we all have those moments, when we just want to be happy, when we just want our spouse to come home happy, or at least with a smile on his or her face.
Sometimes, things work out as planned, and sometimes, they don’t, but have you ever wondered if it was possible to get your spouse in a good mood all the time, at just the snap of your finger, all because you have mastered the tips shared in this article?
Well…now, you know it’s possible.
Make your partner laugh:
I know for one thing, women like a man they can laugh with, and I don’t blame them. Sharing a laughing moment is a great bonding method. As you laugh, you create memories too.
Whether it is goofing around, dancing in the kitchen while preparing a meal, or singing your favourite old songs at the top of your lungs. Find ways to make each other laugh. Life is way too serious and a good laugh is sometimes all you need to cheer up.
Give them space:
I know, you are trying to get them in a good mood and you’re wondering how giving your spouse some space would do that.
Well, if your partner is in a bad mood to start with and often needs time and space to get out of the funk, then do let them have it, no matter how badly you want to help.
And if they are not in a bad mood, then consider it a treat to give your partner some alone time, think peace and quiet to do whatever it is that they want to do.
Do their chores
Many of us hate certain chores, but there just no way around it. They just have to be done.
To get your partner in a great mood, you can volunteer to do some chores around the house; cook dinner, or do laundry or bathe the children, find and arrange all socks, all colour-coordinated.
For some people, acts of service is a major love language, thus, if your partner speaks this language, then doing things for them can make them truly feel loved.
One of the easiest persons to take for granted are our spouses; it’s just so easy. After all, we see them every day and think we know all there is to know about them.
It’s not something that we do on purpose, but the more familiar we get with anything, or anyone, the less we tend to show gratitude.
So whether it’s through simply telling them verbally, writing out a thoughtful card, or leaving post-it notes on the mirror, find some ways to tell them how much you truly appreciate them for who they are, and what they mean in your life.
Don’t take their bad moods personal:
Don’t take it personally. Everyone’s allowed to be in a bad mood, so be careful not to think you did something wrong, or that they’re upset with you.
If/when you think this way, and they are able to sense it or you say it, then it will most likely escalate your partner’s mindset.
Often times, it will worsen the mood, rather than get rid of it.
We get fixated in our habits and regimens, but a little spontaneity every now and again can’t hurt.
Whether it’s in the bedroom, setting up a surprise massage or dinner or going to watch a late night movie, being spontaneous can really propel your partner to their happy place.
Never underestimate the power of doing something out of the norm to help make them smile.
Pull out your best style game:
Put on the dress they love, or dress to impress your partner for no reason. You don’t need one. Even if it’s just for dinner at home or an ice cream run.
In relationships, sometimes we stop trying to impress our partners. We think we’ve “got them,” and that’s all.
But think about how attracted you are to one another when you put yourself together to go out? Well, why wait for a special occasion? Just do it already.
That could mean getting your partner in a good place.
There! You have the tips you need to get your partner in a good mood and how to ensure he/she stays there.
In a relationship, being happy counts for a whole lot…a whole lot…and the earlier we recognise that, the more fulfilling relationships we will all have.
Stay happy, stay in love!
Kristine is a member of The Lovelint team. She is a down to earth person, who says it as it is. Having given relationship advice for years in a national daily, she has found out that fear is one of the main reasons holding people back from enjoying a healthy, happy relationship. She is married with kids and is willing to listen to you and help as much as you let her to.