Now, lady, if you think that everything a guy says to you is what he really wanted to say to you; you are in for a rude shock. I intend to burst some of your long held notions about what your boyfriend says to you versus what he really wants to say.
We guys firmly believe that ladies don’t always appreciate being told the truth. So, we have learnt the value of prevaricating, saying half truths or even outright lies, which is not good but hey! Eve was gotten by what she heard from the satan. If it worked then, you can be sure it works now.
Now, I’m treading on dangerous grounds, lies are bad, very bad but it can sometimes be the only thing a woman wants to hear. And no, Nelo, I would never lie to you. Even if it hurts, I will always say the truth.
One of those questions, a boyfriend usually wishes his lady would not ask him is about weight gain. Nothing in life stays the same, including our bodies. If you noticed the change, like the extra fold in your middle, of course he did too, but that doesn’t necessarily means he has a problem with it. Instead, it’s like”bonus”, improving on what was already there. So relax. You being comfortable in your own skin will always be the ultimate turn-on to your boyfriend.
Unflattering hair style
You might not think about it but the truth is that, your hair style is one of the things a guy quickly notices about a woman. If you make a style that does not flatter you, you can be sure he notices but might never say it but you can bet, he is itching to say, “Babe that’s hair style does nothing for you!” and not mean it in any disparaging way.
Ladies, if your guy were to say that to you after you just returned from the salon, what would you honestly say? Most likely, you would flip out on him but he has opinion too about your hair, which he has a right to hold.
He hasn’t had the time to miss you yet!
When you are asking a man if he misses you and you only just left the house, sometimes he’s tempted to tell the truth and say, “Not Really.” Give him a chance to actually miss you. Let him say it,( not perfunctorily because you asked) and show it when he is ready and the result will be far more rewarding.
At times, a little space will help fuel the passion and keep the fire going.
Is that what you’re wearing?
Yes, he wants to go there too. I will tell you about one time like that, Nelo and I were supposed to go for a wedding. She did not get the asoebi on time, thus decided to dress English formal but when she was through, getting dressed, I felt she was dressed for church rather than a wedding but I dare not say it, not when she stood in front of me, waiting for my approval. I said she was beautiful but it was nay in my heart.
No doubt, you are a fashionista, but every now and then your man has a critique or two – even if he doesn’t voice it at the time. That well known nodding of head, he gives you when you ask if you look good is really his conscious effort not to kill your vibe. Some looks will inevitable appeal to him more to him than others and you want him to feel comfortable telling the truth about which is. Don’t you?
“This is not the way, my mom used to make it”
Well, since, I have touched on some other touchy subjects, some of you, by now would have gotten your ante up; I might as well go all the way. Yes, the way you cook will definitely be different from the way, his mom used to cook and remember, his mother trained his tongue, so it’s going to be a while for him to get used to the way you cook and then, he can’t appreciate it until then. You know, that dish you make him because it’s his favorite is only his favourite when his mother cooks it.
It’s great that you want to learn how to make that specialty meal just for him and I’m sure he appreciates the gesture. But, as is the saying, you win some, you lose some, chose your battles wisely.
“Can We Go To The Gym Together?”
Please note than I mean no offense here and I’m going to tread carefully. Yes, there are times when he notices some changes in your figure that could be potentially be alleviated by a few run to the gym. (And he may feel the same about his own weight gain.)
With that said, he has no right to encourage you to hit the gym if he never goes. If it’s something he desires to do together with you, you should at least give it a try, instead of feeling insulted; especially if fitness is super important to him. Adding that dynamic to your relationship could make things more exciting. Hope no offense is taken.
“Can we not go out today?”
There will be times when he just wants to stay home. Sitting on the couch with his favorite food and a drink can be heaven on earth for a man at times. He knows this can’t happen all the time. But when the moment is right, it can be just as fun to kick it in the crib and just enjoy each other without the outside noise. (Plus, it can be a real money-savor too, but, it is not always about the money).
Ladies, you now know better, hope no offense taken and only lessons learnt.