When Tunrie was asked when she had her first argument with her husband, she thought for a while and burst into laughter. After a while, she said, “On our wedding day. Interestingly, we never used to have arguments but it happened on the very first day we got married. It was our welcome party to married life. We have had more arguments since then, but we have grown too and learnt from those arguments.”
All relationships go through phases. There are times you are all lovey-dovey and can’t get enough of each other. The bland times come too, when you wonder how you managed to get yourself into such a monotonous life with a boring partner, and at the other extreme, you can’t stand your partner’s guts. All of these phases are present and dynamic in a relationship. If judgement is passed on a relationship during one of these phases, it would be faulty, as it would not show the true picture of things, just an aspect.
During the bland and angry phases, it doesn’t mean that love is not present. No, not at all. It just means it’s not being expressed actively as it should. You might have started out with chocolates and sweet late night text messages, which are cute and totally welcome by the way, but deep, meaningful relationships are about how you treat each other as individuals in the long run. It is about showing respect, kindness, empathy and care towards each other. Unfortunately, you won’t always feel like it.
So, for the times you have thought that you probably need to take a break and just go off on your own…(I don’t know about you, but I have) just remember that your relationship is not all lost and ready to be thrown in the trash can, if you still do these things. Hang in there, it’s not as terrible as you think, the sun is still shining.