One-sided Love:  We Are Both In Love With Her


It has got to the stage, where Lanre is now asking himself, if he is normal, if his love affair with this Mase was okay. If he is truly out of it like most of his friends and family, and now his mom are saying.  He wasn’t exactly sure what to believe or what to do about his crazy love affair with Mase.

Before you wonder too far, what the love affair was about, here’s Lanre’s story.

“I met Mase at a party. It was a very lit party as they say now, loads to eat, overflow of drinks, a seemingly endless supply of babes, it was outdoors but the lighting was such that, you will think, we were at a night club.

I was having a swell time, until I saw a fair babe dancing right through the smoke in front of me. I swear, that moment is permanently imprinted on my mind in slow motions. I could see her move as though especially for me.

In that moment I was lost, I hadn’t seen her face, but I would recognise that body anyway. That was how I got a mission at the party. I set about looking for the fair babe and not long after I found her, still dancing and for few moments, I stayed and just watched her gyration. This was a girl, who knew how to enjoy herself and I liked that.

Soon, I noticed that she was getting more attention so, I quickly made my move and asked if I could dance with her.  She didn’t answer, she just slithered close to me and I was in heaven.  

We danced and danced, until I was tired but she was still going strong. Meanwhile, all my attempts to make conversation with her failed, in the end, it was her friend, who gave me her number and another volunteered her name.

I started my pursuit in earnest, called, sent messages, which went unanswered. One day, she picked the call and it turned out, I had been given a wrong number. It was the number of a sharp tongued married woman, who let me know in no uncertain terms to stop my “useless messages” and not use my boy crush to send her away from her matrimonial home.

As soon as I finished apologising, I deleted the number and started calling everyone, who would know about the lady I was dancing with at the party weeks ago. Of course, they all remembered but there was no one who had her number.

I wondered what kind of mysterious girl Mase was and was thinking of other ways to reach her, when a friend returned my calls and told me, although, he didn’t know her number, he knew where she lives. That was music to my ears, better than even her contacts.

That was how I turned up at her house one Sunday evening with my friend, who knew her house.  Upon opening the door, Mase burst in to laughter, “You this guy again? Literally everyone has been telling me, about how you have been searching for you. Wetin I buy from your hand, wey I no pay?”


That was a better welcome than my friend and I had anticipated. She asked us to come in, introduced us to her parents, with a short story of how we had met and how I had been looking for her. At that part, I squirmed, as I could feel two pairs of eyes scrutinise me from up to down.

Then the gist session started, of course, with some chilled drinks, as my offer to take her out was firmly rebuffed. Mase was so easy to talk to, that I had no idea, the day was that gone, until, I started getting the look again and it was time for Mase to make dinner.

I checked my watch and time was gone. This time, I made sure to get her number, called the number and saw her phone lit up before I left.  My day was made. I had a new crush, which I was definitely turning into girlfriend, if all works out well.

It did. After two visits under the scrutiny of her parents, she agreed to a date with me and that was all I needed to tell her, how I felt about her.  Long story short, she agreed to date me.  With this babe, there is no guile at all and that is something I love a lot about her; no forming, no fronting, just an honest to God girl.

And that was how our love affair started off on a great note, we were into each other. She was in her final year in the university and I was working. I didn’t want to distract her, as she had a lot on her plate, but I also wanted to spend time with her. We worked something out in the evenings and everyone was happy.

Mase finished her examination, did her convocation, which even my siblings showed up for, as they had become close friends over the months. She went for her youth service and came back. And that was when things changed.

Suddenly, Mase wasn’t as available to me, as she was in the past. Another thing that changed was the fact that, Mase now had guile. Even though, she didn’t need it, I could feel her urge to control me, whip me around her little fingers and just have her way.

Mehn, I was all for it. She’s got me where she wanted me anyways, what I couldn’t understand was her need to consciously do it.

Just as I noticed, everyone started to notice this controlling tendency in Mase and warned me about it.

But I was beyond caring, until the day, I found a note and flowers from a lover of hers and she had just passed it off as a random message. I’m a guy, I don’t buy fresh flowers for a crush, but I would buy for a lover, which the note attached to the flowers clearly said they were.

My heart was broken. I walked out on her for the first time in the more than two years, we have been dating.

She didn’t call me or send me a text message to apologise or talk about the incident. I had to swallow my pride and called to arrange a date with her to talk about how I felt.

Mase still insisted, the flower guy was only a friend. The reality, I have found out over the past weeks is there; there are more guys where that flower guy came from.

And I wonder, why are all the guys are on my Mase’s case now? Why does she seem to be enjoying the drama, all of this is turning out to be? What is it, I’m not doing well that these other guys are obviously doing, that’s turning my babe’s head?

Importantly, why can’t I let go? She isn’t my first babe, she doesn’t have to be my last but I find myself stringing myself along in this charade.”

That’s the reality of Lanre’s one-sided love affair with Mase. Will it end well? Most likely not. It will end with heartbreak for Lanre, either he leaves with his pride intact or Mase dumps him.

And that young lady looks like, she’s having the very best time of her life now, juggling all these men, but I’m also conscious of the fact that I only have Lanre’s version of events.

What would you advice Lanre to do?

Remember to stay in love and a happy New Year to you


Kristine Signature

Kristine is a member of  The Lovelint team. She  is a down to earth person, who says it as it is. Having given relationship advice for years in a national daily, she has found out that fear is one of the main reasons holding people back from enjoying a healthy, happy relationship. She is married with kids and is willing to listen to you and help as much as you let her to.

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