If you ever had sex in a hotel room and thought, “Well, that was better than it usually is,” you’re not the only one.
Turns out there are chemical responses that occur in our brains when we have sex in a hotel bed, that don’t necessarily happen in our personal bedrooms, says Ian Kerner, a licensed psychotherapist, sex counselor and best-selling author of “She Comes First” and “Passionista: The Empowered Woman’s Guide To Pleasuring A Man.”
When a couple engages in sexual acts in a hotel room, versus the bedroom, “the novelty of the hotel room is going to stimulate dopamine transmission in the brain, which pays a big role in arousal and sexual excitement,” Kerner told HuffPost.
Hotels are an indulgence:
Because hotels are often designed to be luxurious and sensual — there’s good lighting, candles, expensive sheets, a big bed, it’s designed to appeal to the five senses — “there’s a psychological mindset when people check into a hotel that they can pamper themselves. There’s something a little luxurious, languorous, sumptuous about a hotel that lends itself to feeling sexual.”
Hotels help us check out of our stressful lives, which inhibits us to relax and enjoy the moment — whether spent in or out of bed.
Another factor Kerner points out is that “for sexual arousal to occur, especially in women, parts of the brain associated with anxiety and stress need to turn off,” he said. “So I often advise couples to turn their bedroom into a love nest that’s free from distractions. I think a hotel — as a sort of generic luxury — automatically helps people tune out the anxiety. There aren’t photos of kids, bills that need to be paid, books that need to be read; you’re in a place out of time, out of your life. And the shutting down or the pushing away of that anxiety, creating a boundary of anxiety and stressors of everyday life, is going to contribute to sexual arousal.”
And, perhaps best of all, you don’t have to go very far:
You don’t really have to be on vacation to reap the benefits. In perhaps the best argument for taking more staycations, Kerner says hotels inherently spice things up, just by being different than the norm.
“Sometimes sex therapists often advise patients to switch up their sex scripts and try having sex in different positions, or try having sex in different rooms,” Kerner said. “So inherently, going to a hotel is going to provide a break in the routine that’s also going to be stimulating.”