Merely looking at her profile picture, I couldn’t for the life of me, grasp the reason for Tuoyo’s insecurity. I felt, how on earth could a fine-man-no-pimples babe with an enviable career and nice figure, even after two kids, be complaining about her husband being too good looking.
Hmmm, let’s just say I instantly got the full picture, when she sent me an image of her husband. The man fine die! In fact, no one has a right to be that handsome. He’s a six feet tall, broad shouldered, toned bodied adonis of a man. A broad forehead with a full head of hair leading to a pointed nose and nice lips, that was spread in a disarming smile in that photo. His chiselled jawline did a good job of showing off the cherry on top, his double dimple. His day 3 beard actually invites your caress (I hope my husband doesn’t read this piece). Let’s not even talk about his brown eyes.
I got all these from an image his wife sent to me and immediately, I knew why she’s so conscious of her physical looks. You cannot marry that kain fine man and be sloppy in the looks department. Even if you were not so into your looks before then, you have to be.
Tuoyo was one hot babe back then, not to say that she isn’t now. She was the girl every guy wanted to date, and only the truly fierce ones got to talk to her. For you to actually date her, you must have something extraordinary. What that was, I have no idea, but she knew what she was looking for.
I guess when her husband showed up, he must have had that magic combination, because she fell for him real hard and they did not date for long before they got married. Everyone who attended their marriage, or knew them as a couple, often talked about how they would make beautiful babies, which turned out to be true. Their girls are so cute, they are like a dream; a perfect blend of both Tuoyo and her husband’s best features.
What led to the conversation between Tuoyo, my on-and-off-friend was the situation with her mom, who has become a staunch Michael (Tuoyo’s husband) fan. He can do no wrong. He has got his parents-in-law, in fact her whole family, in his pocket and he has no qualms about milking it to his advantage.
Michael had said he was going out with a few of his friends and had been unreachable for throughout the night. Only for him to show up at home, early the next morning with his married best friend and a sheepish grin on both their faces.
Tuoyo, who had barely slept a wink was fuming and they got the sharpest edge of her tongue. She was so raw, she laid into both of them, that the friend quickly made his excuses and left. Now, what was his excuse for not coming home?
They had been too drunk to drive and hence slept over at the hotel. Tuoyo didn’t buy that story at all. Michael had a tendency of disappearing nights or days at times, with no tangible excuse. She had given him the silent treatment for three days, something he could not take for long, so he had gone to report her to her mom, who called her daughter, to rant and beg her to stop the silent treatment, “Ko fa oko mo’ra, so ti gbo mi?” (draw your husband close to you. Do you hear me?) Tuoyo’s mom had said down the phone lines, without listening or wanting to listen to any story from her.
If his once-in-a-blue-moon disappearance was just it, it would have been easy to take, but his physical beauty is almost a liability in their marriage. Somehow, everyone believes him more than they do her. Her family and friends are absolutely in love with him and if she were to give the word, some of her friends would gladly jump on him.
While, I see where she’s coming from, this is simply a matter of marrying a man with a higher stake in the beauty ranking than you. Almost, everyone wants a piece of your pie, which, of course will be flattering at first, but it won’t take long before it becomes a source of concern.
Mary has been in those shoes too before, only she did not marry him and she says, “What’s annoying is that when you’re with a really hot guy, other girls have no qualms about coming up and hitting on him right in front of you. When I was dating my fine bobo, girls will turn and blatantly stare at my boyfriend in the street. It did not even matter that I was with him. In the beginning, it was a confidence boost, but it’s hard to deal with on a daily basis, especially when you don’t 100 percent trust the person you’re dating.”
Just ask Victoria Beckham, she could probably write a dissertation on the agony of being married to a hot guy.
When David Beckham was the hottest piece of biceps strutting his stuff on the football field, Victoria suffered everything from cheating, to death threats, to women literally throwing themselves at his feet in her presence, to nannies attempting to write tell-all books.
Even now the poor woman has banned carbohydrates from her diet and instead goes from one fad diet to another in the name of looking young and skinny for her hot husband. Now, I don’t really mean that in a negative sense. Truthfully, who really wants all this trouble?
Incidentally, this is not about gorgeous men, but hot people in general. When you have so many people throwing themselves at you, you’re spoiled for choice, so there’s less incentive to be faithful. Not to mention that people get away with so much more when they’re attractive.
To marry a hot dude, you need loads of self-confidence, and then some. But importantly, you need a man, who’s truly committed to you and isn’t interested in other women, not even for a moment.
If you are dating a hot guy with roving eyes, good luck with your blood pressure and battle arm.
Just know you can do better for yourself.
Kristine is a member of The Lovelint team. She is a down to earth person, who says it as it is. Having given relationship advice for years in a national daily, she has found out that fear is one of the main reasons holding people back from enjoying a healthy, happy relationship. She is married with kids and is willing to listen to you and help as much as you let her to.