Last year, it was as though Sarah had been jinxed, she was dumped by three men; the last relationship lasted for a mere two months. Yes, the break up session was quite mature and decent but there was nothing new to add to what she had heard from the other guys.They did not feel equal with her. They believed she deserved better and they were not the better. So they left. Good riddance to bad rubbish I say. But for Sarah, those break ups were significant, it showed that men were unable to deal with her fairly successful life.
Sarah ran a successful business of her own, which employed close to ten staff but she was also very homely, a great cook and had firm control of her time; she was the boss lady after all, so she could determine her working hours. So, there was never an issue with her availability for dates. She always worked something out. But, these men still felt intimidated by her and ended the relationship, as they felt emasculated by her apparent success. However, instead of ending a good relationship from feeling inferior, they could have just done things different.
One of the things those ex boyfriends could have addressed from the very beginning of their relationship was the elephant in the room, their obvious different financial levels. Admittedly, they might not know the true state of things before they got into a relationship with Sarah but they would have seen the lay of the land soon enough and could have addressed the issue immediately. While, it might not be expected or conventional to address such matters, it would have definitely cleared the air in the relationship.
Instead of using it as the reason for leaving her, they could have used it as a stepping stone to an improved relationship with her. But then I guess, they were not good enough for her after all, hence, would never think of doing that.
Did I mention that Sarah said towards the end of all the relationships, she felt like she was competing with the men? They would try to play catch up, when it came to spending money. Like buying her expensive gifts which she knew they could not really afford. But whenever she so much as hinted that they need not have bothered with such an expensive gift, it would turn into a quarrel, which involved them telling her that they could carry their own weight in the relationship and knew how to treat their woman. Of course, she kept quiet and watched them literally try to annihilate their finances in order to impress her and that was where they got it all wrong. It did not matter to her. Sarah did not need to be bought expensive gifts to know she was loved.
Obviously there was some sort of miscommunication between Sarah and her exes, as they always tried to keep up with her ‘expensive’ tastes. She wanted normal but they thought Sarah wanted expensive gifts. These guys would have done themselves a world of good, if they had just loved her on their own level. With what they could afford, instead of trying to play catch up.
As your buddy, I’m going to help you out with some tips that will make it easier for you to date a woman more successful than you are and actually enjoy it. First of all, a successful lady needs a man who is manly enough to celebrate her success with her, not one who makes her feel like defending how she feels and, you know what? That is just fine. It is a basic need. If you are in a relationship, you want to be comfortable enough to share with the other person. If you push her back up against the wall, with your inferiority complex or ill attitude, she would probably withdraw from you. So, stay on your lane and provide as much support as you can. Money is not everything in a relationship.
Remember, Sarah was the one who was always arranging her schedules to accommodate dates and outings. It need not be so. You could both work it out to ensure you are both available to spend time with each other. Once a woman starts to feel as though she is forcing herself on you, you are on your way out of that relationship.
And never forget, just because a woman does not need your money to survive, it does not mean that she does not want you as an integral part of her life or want you to forsake you manly role in the relationship. So, still plan the dates according to your financial state and generally treat her as the gentle man you are. While you are at it, get to know the woman you are dating. Instead of focusing on her bank statement, how much she earns in relations to you, you should instead try to find interests you have in common, activities you both enjoy that does not necessarily involve monetary considerations.
Lastly, you should not get offended if she buys you an expensive gift once in a while. That’s just her own way of showing that she cares about you but when those gifts becomes regular, then it causes concern, as it might be that she is trying to brush up your image to her standards. That, I tell you is a sign that she is not proud of your current state and it might be a good idea to talk about those gifts, especially, if you don’t want to be a kept man.
Anyway, after last year’s disastrous dating experiences, Sarah had decided to take a hiatus off dating for a while, to reassess her priorities and what she really wants from a man. I hope she will meet someone good enough to date her and redeem the pride of the male folks in her eyes.
Let’s get rolling guys!