Betsy is a 38-year-old single mom, who lives just outside town, and runs her own business. Betsy says she is “consummately positive — an ex called me ‘pathologically happy’ — strong-willed and principled.” Betsy enjoys “simple pleasures, like a walk, grocery shopping, a long meal, socializing with close friends, spending time with animals and having philosophical conversations.” She says that she wants to be in a relationship with “mutual respect. Without it, a relationship means nothing, but with it, anything’s possible.”
I connected with Anthony online, and we had sporadic contact, but didn’t rush to meet each other. I knew that he was also newly divorced with children, and was also self-employed.
One day in the summer, before we even met, a gorgeous bouquet of flowers with a card was delivered to me at work. My staff knew I was single and gave me some looks, wondering who sent them. The card said that the sender hoped the flowers had reached their intended recipient, but if not, to enjoy them and the mystery. Anthony had put together some details and made an educated guess about where I worked.
That night, I emailed him and said he had my attention. We started emailing more regularly. A month later, Anthony asked me if I’d be interested in being his date to an event. I agreed, and was intrigued.
We met at the halfway point between our homes. I got out of my car wearing an elegant dress, and Anthony looked great in a tuxedo. I got into his car for the drive to the party. We had an easy conversation in the car that mirrored the tone of our emails. There was an obvious attraction between us.
Anthony said that he needed to get one thing off his chest right away, and that was to let me know that his recent divorce was actually his second. I appreciated that he made a point of telling me that. It was honest and sincere, and a man who has been through some challenges in life is more interesting to me than someone who has had it easy. I could see Anthony relax once he saw that I wasn’t impacted by that news in a negative way.
I asked how a person in his totally-unrelated business got involved with the kind of event we were going to, to which he replied he was active in local politics. He instantly became even more intriguing. I had the impression that while I live more with my heart than my head, Anthony is disciplined and calm.
Anthony walked me into the party with his hand protectively on the small of my back. He introduced me to his friends, never letting on that we had just met. The party was very “high society” and everyone was dressed to the nines.
After the reception, we saw the film, and then there was more mingling. The wife of one of Anthony’s film friends asked if I’d be back the next day, for a party celebrating a different film. I told her no, trying not to let on that Anthony and I had just met, and that I had no idea there was another party to go to. She said that she would invite me as her guest, if I needed her to, and then she approached Anthony and asked if he and I could attend. I felt awkward and tried not to show it.
Anthony rolled with it, and took me aside to ask if I’d come with him the next day. He told me he’d figure out the details. I pointed out that he’d taken a big chance asking me to come with him to such a high-profile event without really knowing me, to which he replied that he’d had a pretty good feeling about who I was, and was happy to take the chance.
The next morning, Anthony called me at work and let me know that a limo would pick me up. After a nap in the back of the limo on the drive to his place, I was ready. It felt like no time had passed since the night before — the conversation with Anthony picked up exactly where it had left off.
We ate an amazing dinner, and then stood on a patio to watch the sunset. That night, there was a live band and dancing, and Anthony spent the perfect amount of time alternating between staying by my side and allowing me to have my own conversations with the interesting mix of guests. It was amazing to feel like an old couple moving in tandem, while also having the excitement of having just met.
At the end of that night, after an epic two-part date, I spontaneously walked over to Anthony to give him a full-body embrace, with a kiss. I didn’t even know that my body was going to do that! It happened without any command from my brain. Here was this fine man in front of me, showing complete respect, and full of fun and adventure, sigh. We’ve been together ever since.