It is always easy to connect physically with a man, because…well men are more likely to respond when you take the physical approach. You get my drift? Offer a man sex, and 6 out of 10 times, you will not be turned down. You can even reach a man’s mind with some logical reasoning, but reaching his emotions, beneath the walls and shields they have been buried, can be something else entirely. It’s well worth it though…especially if you want more than sex from a man.
If you want more than a physical relationship with a man, that does not start and end behind the doors of a bedroom, then you know that you need to reach that man’s emotions. You need to connect on a level beyond the physical, beyond reason, a level where, not only you can trust him with your emotions, but he can trust you with his.
When a man connects emotionally with a woman, distance means nothing, his emotions become attuned to hers, and he oftentimes knows what he needs to do, to please his woman, because he has released the guard over his emotions, and allowed his better half reach this very soft part of his heart. Do you need anymore reasons to want to connect with your man emotionally? Who doesn’t want a man who is attuned to their every emotion? That’s a sensitive man, and you don’t get many of them.
For some couples, this comes naturally, both parties just find themselves connecting on that special level while, for some other couples, it’s something that they have to work at achieving. If you fall into the latter group, like some couples do, there are three steps you can take to achieve this emotional connection with your man.
1. Be vulnerable
Men are instinctively protective of their own. The story of the damsel in trouble isn’t just a story for its own sake. The fact that you show your vulnerable side to him, helps him to see you for who you are, not some façade you can put on, the same way you put on your make-up.
You don’t just have to be vulnerable, you also have to let him help you through those moments, when you are down and out. Allow him be your hero, and just soak in the moments.
Now, you ask, how will this help him connect with me on an emotional level? The deal is, once he sees you are vulnerable with him, he starts to shed his man-mask, if there is such a thing as that. He shows you his real side, no pretence, no machoism, no fronting, just himself! You become his safe place, where he can be himself, knowing there would be no condemnation for him, or a roll call of advice tumbling from your lips, at the mention of a challenge. Just the voice of a woman, who understands him, and that will always be a hit with your man, any day, any time.
2. Show you love his touch
And if those touches are of the sexual kind, that is one good way to reach his soul and connect with the innermost being there is. The essence is not just in the sexual act itself, but in the build-up, the words, which you crooned in his ears, the expressions of your current feelings and such. Then it will not just be sex, it will be a communion of souls and bodies. While this might not be possible all the time, it is important that you remember to reaffirm to your man that you still love him, and care about his touches.
3. Enjoy the moment with him
Next time you go out with your partner, quit talking about your friend’s fiancé, who is giving her headache. You are giving him a headache too, so just stop it. Forget the aso ebi you need to buy, the drama in your office or family, for once, and just enjoy the moment, without it being tinged with any pressure.
If he is talking or playing football, talk about it, cheer like crazy from the side-lines, while he plays. Never mind the sweaty shirts of your guy, all that matters is that he looks and sees you in his corner, enjoying the moment as much as he is doing.
Another aspect of this being in the moment is the issue of being playful. If you are wondering what playful and your man have in common, find out. Men like to play, and if they find someone who is genuinely playful, and happy in her life, they don’t want to leave. They connect over play, and then it would move to something bigger. Lady, you need to start having a positive, loving relationship with yourself, which will flow into your relationship with your man.
There you are on the road to bonding with your man emotionally. Let’s know how it goes.
Make love and not war!
Kristine is a member of The Lovelint team. She is a down to earth person, who says it as it is. Having given relationship advice for years in a national daily, she has found out that fear is one of the main reasons holding people back from enjoying a healthy, happy relationship. She is married with kids and is willing to listen to you and help as much as you let her to.